Take What Works To Overcome Shyness.
Chances are that as we get closer to Christmas, that your work functions are now behind you and you can focus on the parties/lunches/dinners with close family and friends. In most of these cases I feel safe in assuming that these gatherings are not the type to bring on anxiety and shyness, or at least not the major culprits.
So take a few moments to take notice and ask yourself the following:
1. How comfortable and relaxed you feel.
2. Why do you feel this relaxed?
3. What is it that ‘works’ in this situation?
The idea is that if you are not shy or anxious in these situations, there is something about them that works. It’s important for you to take a look at your own situation, as everyone is different. But when I have asked these questions of myself my answers have been:
1. I feel comfortable.
2. I am not thinking about me, my focus is elsewhere.
Apply this knowledge to overcome shyness.
The question then becomes how can I take this and use it in other social situations.
Your reasons from step one might be different to mine, buy I will use mine as an example:
1. Feel comfortable.
The best way I have found to deal with this is to slowly extend the situations I feel comfortable in. I do this by challenging my comfort zone and establishing an end goal and breaking it down into manageable steps.
2. Focus elsewhere.
The best way I have found to deal with this is practice. It helps when you are in a situation where you can talk with others about things you are passionate about. Otherwise, find things to focus on and take a genuine interest in others and what they have to say.
Taking a look at the social situations that you feel at easy and totally comfortable in, can give you great insight as to what is working for you. Then take what works and apply it to other social situations.
December 19th, 2007 at 9:20 am
[...] Check it out! While looking through the blogosphere we stumbled on an interesting post today.Here’s a quick excerpt Chances are that as we get closer to Christmas, that your work functions are now behind you and you can focus on the parties/lunches/dinners with close family and friends. In most of these cases I feel safe in assuming that these gatherings are not the type to bring on anxiety and shyness, or at least not the major culprits. So take a few moments to take notice and ask yourself the following: 1. How comfortable and relaxed you feel. 2. Why do you feel this relaxed? 3. What is it tha [...]
December 20th, 2007 at 2:51 am
I like the way to put things. It really makes good sense.