Don’t Be Shy

16 strangers find themselves left somewhere in china.  They must survive the elements, fight hunger, cope with lack of sleep and most critical they must survive the social game that is survivor.  Even if you don’t like reality shows they hold a lot of insight to social interaction and how relationships are quickly built and destroyed.  As an avid survivor fan watching each season I have noticed four common elements that each winner displays throughout their game.  Factors that are key to their win.

1. Assess the social dynamic and work out where they can fit in.

Due to the nature of the game, teams are often shuffled around and players can find themselves in a new group many times.  The winners have been able to quickly assess the dynamic of the group and understand what role each person plays.  They know who holds the power, where they loyalties are, and where they aren’t.    Once they assess the group dynamic they work out where they can fit in this group. 

2. Be quick to adapt.

The fish out water idea is the basis for the show.  How do people react outside their comfort zone.  Those that quickly and easily adapt and do so without complaint and instead with good nature do the best in the game survivor.  Usually the first people to leave are those that complain and moan a lot. 

3. Show interest and bond others.

Players that show interest in others and inquire after their family and friends, what their life is like back home are well liked.  And it’s pretty clear why this is.  But very often players vote on how much they like someone rather than strategically, especially in the initial days. 

4. Luck.

Luck always has a part to play in the game survivor.  Luck of what team you get on, the luck of who you make friends with etc, all play a role in who wins.
Applying this to your life.

Applying this to your life 

When you join a group take a few moments to observe the roles each person holds.  And while social situations aren’t quite as dramatic as the game of survivor understanding how the group functions and how everyone fits with-in the group can be of great help.  Look to see who is the leader, is anyone challenging the leader, who is just happy to follow, how are decisions made. 

From my own shy experience, I have found sitting back and observing comes very easy, and instead it is joining the conversations that is the biggest challenge.  However, I have found talking the time to observe the group beneficial.  Firstly, it can allow you to find your place in the group easier.  And Secondly, having an understanding of the group can help you feel more comfortable.

When you approach new social situations take time to observe others and assess the roles that people.  I have found shyness to be a advantage with this. 

 Showing genuine interest in other people is how friendships are developed.  Since we are not playing the game survivor we don’t have to worry about getting voted off.  But if you want social success taking the time to get to know people, being genuinely interest in others is always the best way to go. 

About Survivor 

Survivor is not so much about surviving the elements of harsh unforgiving land, but about surviving a social game.   The contestants must live together 24/7, compete with then against each other, vote each other out, then turn around and ask for a vote to win the million dollars.  Therefore winning the game is all about being able to establish a bond with others because at the end a lot of people vote based on their hurt feelings and not who played the game the best.     Survivor china has just begin in the US.  It screens each Thursday night on CBS.